Can You Make Me Skinny, Rich, Famous & Ageless? Let's Talk About Rituals, Reality & Responsibility

As an experienced practicing witch and professional ritual worker, I’ve seen and heard it all; from the heartfelt to the hilarious, from the sacred to the straight-up unrealistic.

And there’s a list of ritual requests that come in so frequently, they deserve their own place in the Hall of Witchy Misconceptions. So let’s break down the Top Unrealistic Ritual Requests that witches often receive, and have an honest chat about why these outcomes aren’t as simple, or as magical, as people might hope.

“Make Me Rich! I Want to Be a Millionaire!”

Here’s the deal: Magic can open doors, yes, absolutely. It can amplify your energy, align opportunities, attract abundance, and help shift your mindset into wealth. But it cannot drop seven digits into your bank account overnight like a cosmic lottery ticket.

Why? Because that would require bending reality to a degree that goes beyond energetic influence, it enters the realm of fantasy. Money spells work with your actions, mindset, and consistency, not instead of them. You want to be a millionaire? That's great. Start building, investing, and planning, and then add a wealth ritual to help keep the momentum strong.

Otherwise, if casting a spell was all it took to be rich, you’d be watching my daily vlog series from a ruby bathtub in my castle, trust me.

“Make Me Skinny. Like, Tomorrow.”

This one is heartbreaking in its frequency. Society has trained so many of us to believe our worth is tied to our bodies, and it leads to requests like this: “Make me skinny with a spell. Fast.”

But witchcraft isn’t a crash diet, and it’s not liposuction in candle form. Spells for health, self-love, motivation, body confidence, or focus? Yes. But waving a wand and changing someone’s entire physical structure? That’s not ethical magic, it’s delusion and dangerous territory.

Wanting to feel better in your body is valid, and I support rituals that help you feel strong, motivated, clear-headed, and more in tune with your health. But true transformation? It’s an inside job with your body, your choices, and your spiritual support all working together.

“I Want to Be Ageless. Make My Wrinkles Disappear.”

The oh so popular quest for immortality.

But let’s be real: Witchcraft can support vitality. It can help you feel more radiant, aligned, rested, and youthful in spirit. There are herbs, oils, and rituals that help you connect with your natural beauty and power at any age. But a spell to erase time itself?

That’s not how nature, or magic, works.

Aging is sacred. It’s a passage. A process. A power. Witchcraft honors that process. It doesn’t pretend to erase it.

“Make Me Famous and Rich and Beautiful!”

This is the “all of the above” request. And it usually comes with very little self-awareness, no real plan, and the assumption that I can somehow plug their name into a fame algorithm and bam—red carpet, millions of followers, and a book or record deal.

And here’s the truth: Magic enhances what already exists within you. It gives you clarity, magnetism, momentum, and intention. If you want to be a singer, actor, creator, or writer, your talent and effort are the fuel. A spell can light the fire, but it’s not the stage, the manager, or the 2 a.m. grind. Trust me...there's a big grind.

And if you want fame for the sake of being famous? Ask yourself why. Magic has a funny way of shining a mirror on what really matters.

Other Common Unrealistic Ritual Requests

• “Make my ex fall in love with me again… right now… even though they blocked me and got married.” Let’s just say… There is a level of ethics and consent involved in love magic. Also: red flags everywhere.

• “Make me have a baby even though I’m not trying, not ovulating, and not sure I want one.” Magic isn’t a fertility clinic. It can support the journey, but it doesn’t override biology or free will.

• “Can you hex my neighbor for parking in front of my house?” I mean… technically? Yes. Ethically? No. Please don’t waste magic on petty nonsense. It’s like using a sword to slice bread.

The Bottom Line

Witchcraft is not a replacement for action, reality, or responsibility. It is a tool for transformation, a path of empowerment, and a bridge between the seen and unseen. But it’s not a magic vending machine where you press “A1” and out comes your dream life without effort. This is highly unrealistic, unreasonable, and unfair to have this perspective on ritual work or energy work.

If I could make anyone rich, ageless, famous, or thin overnight…I would have already changed the world in various ways. I’d have healed the sick, ended hunger, abolished suffering, and funded every spiritual seeker’s dream home in the forest.

But that’s not how this works. Instead, I help you find the courage to change.

To dream boldly.

To take aligned action.

To trust the magic inside you, not just around you.

And that, my dear, is where the real power lives. Blessings, Avanjia  – Witch, Educator, and Spellcaster Who’s Not Living in a European Castle (Yet) www.thehourofwitchery.com